


poety

by Allyexis123



Category: Original Work
Genre: Depression, Gyms, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mental Health Issues, Mental Hospital, Panic Attacks, Past Suicide Attempt, Poetry, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Watch
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-12
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2018-11-13 05:10:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11177727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Allyexis123/pseuds/Allyexis123
Summary: my poetry master list





	1. numb

**Author's Note:**

> Triger warnings: mention of blood, mental hospitals, menton of cutting, talk of suicide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i was super depressed when i wrote this, but eh

I miss the sight of it,  
My blood.  
Why had they put me in this place,  
Where I can’t see its beautiful red pigment.  
  
I hate it here,  
I want to go home.  
I want to go to my home,  
To my house.

Home to my bathroom,  
to my bathtub and sink.  
home to my blades,  
To my death.  
   
I hate this,  
I hate all of it.  
Why did they make me come here?  
All I was doing was trying to be happy.  
Now I’m stuck here,  
In this hell.  
  
I wonder when they're going to let me leave,  
I’ve been here for a over week now.  
Or more I don’t know exactly,  
I’m not counting.  
I’ve seen people come and go,  
While I’ve been here.

I must have been here for a long time.  
  
The nurses and doctors say they’ll let me leave,  
but only when they know I’m safe.

But what is there to make me not safe?

I’m not hurting myself,  
Only dulling the pain of existence.  
I’m helping myself,  
Not harming myself.  
These people don’t know anything.  
  
It’s so boring here,  
I wish they would let me have my things.

I want to draw,  
but pencils are too sharp.  
I want to paint,  
but paint is poisonous.  
  
I want to leave,  
But I cant.  
I want to go away  
But I'm not aloud.  
  
I want to die,  
Why can't I just die.


	2. gym. panic.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> place and emotion practice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> triger warning: panic arracks

The need to hide  
Fear taking over  
my body shaking  
Vibrating violently

Whuring of machines  
Like an earthquake  
Deafeningly loud  
In my head

The smell dried  
Sweat in the air  
Artificial cleaner  
Mixed as poison

Vision blurred  
Colors mixing  
No shapes left  
Abstract images


End file.
